Okay In The End
by filmgurl2008
Summary: Jack survived the shooting, only just. Bobby goes to see him in the hospital. . .but is Jackie really okay? SLASH bobbyXjack.


"First you kill my mother," Bobby's fist slammed into Sweet's face for what felt like and probably was the hundredth time. "and then you do something even more stupid."

Sweet coughed up blood, and lifted his head from the ice to look at the _Michigan mauler_ –he deserved his nickname. "And what was that?" He sneered, his voice croaking.

Bobby's jaw clenched angrily; the bastard had the gaul to not even acknowledge what he had done! He grabbed the bastard's jumper and hauled him to his knees, he looked down at him –giving a look that Jackie had once described as pure malice. "You killed the thing that mattered most to me."

Sweet's eye widened. And Bobby could read every emotion in the man's eyes –confusion, then recognition, then panic, then worry and then finally fear.

Bobby slammed his fist into his face again. Sweet fell to the ground. He wanted to keep hitting the bastard until he was dead. . .he had took his Ma', he had took his Jack-Jackie. _His_ Jackie. The only person he had cared for so much. He was gone. Fuck. Jack was gone. What the fuck was he supposed to do now? How the fuck was he supposed to go on? How-He looked down at Sweet as he heard a chocked chuckle like sound. "What the fuck you laughing at?"

"Y-you're all worked up. . .'cause I killed t-that _kid_?"

Bobby snarled at Sweet before kicking him under the chin, his head flying backwards and his body sprawling across the ice. He clenched his fists and looked at the other men standing around. "He's yours to finish." And with that, he turned, picked up his coat and set off.

* * *

"_Hey Bobby?" Jack said as he looked up at his oldest brother. _

"_Yeah?" Bobby looked over at Jack as he pulled the car to stop at the red light. His baby brother's left eye was bruised, his cheek was scratched and his bottom lip was cut. Damn it, he was only a kid._

"_You're a good big brother."_

_Bobby's eyes widened a little in surprise. He had been a big brother to Jerry and Angel for almost ten years now, and he hadn't heard those words before. It. . .felt _good_ to hear them. He looked back out the window as the light turned green. "Yeah?" _

"_Yeah. In fact, you're the best big brother ever. In the whole world."_

* * *

"_Hey, Ma'? Ma'!?" Bobby sighed; maybe she was out. "Jerry? Angel?" Maybe everyone was out? He shrugged and went into the living room. . .stopping suddenly. There was a boy sitting on the end of the sofa. _

_The kid couldn't have been any older than eight. He had blond hair that was all over the place, his used-to-be-white t-shirt was at least two sizes too big and his jeans were faded and had rips in the knees. His big doe like eyes were an unusual too blue colour. . .such a beautiful colour though. The kid was cute. . .but he was scared. _

_Bobby only just realised the kid had been inching away, further away from him. He frowned, confused. "Hey," He said quietly, smiling. _

_And then thought maybe he should have kept his mouth shut. The kid jumped up from the seat, his eyes even wider, and hurried around to the arm of the sofa, almost as if he was hiding. _

"_Err, w-wait," He took a step further into the room, just as Evelyn walked in. _

"_Oh Jack, it's okay, don't worry." She said softly and walked over to the little boy. "This is Bobby, he's your oldest brother. He won't let anyone hurt you, and that includes himself, right Bobby?" _

_Bobby watched as Jack looked away from his ma' and over to him. He kept his eyes on the boy's, and after a moment he could see the panic fade just the slightest bit. "Right." He practically promised. _

* * *

"_Bobby wait!" Jack yelled and hurried after his brother. _

"_Not now Jack." Bobby said, still walking away. He was a coward. He was a coward. Fuck sake, he was such a fucking coward! This was what he had wanted. How many times had he thought about Jackie saying those words to him? How many fucking times!? And this was what he was doing now he finally had? He was walking away. Fuck. _

"_Bobby, please." Jack begged and grabbed Bobby's wrist. "Please, don't do this. Don't walk away man, please." He looked into his brother's eyes, and felt his begin to water. "I-it's okay, if you don't feel the same I mean. I just. . .shit. I just wanted you to know how I-I mean-. . ." _

_Bobby watched Jack struggle to find the words he wanted to say. He couldn't talk. He knew what he wanted to say to Jackie. He knew what he should do. But. . .he couldn't speak. He couldn't tell Jack those words for one reason – Jack deserved better. _

_He sighed and stepped away from his baby brother, because that's what Jackie had to be to him, his brother and nothing more. . .not anymore. They couldn't kiss, they couldn't fuck, they couldn't make love, they probably shouldn't even hug or share the same bed like they had when Jackie was a child. In fact, the least he saw Jackie. . .the better. _

"_Save it, Jackie. I don't care." He turned and started to leave, his heart sinking as he heard Jack say 'You're lying. . .' in a teary and defeated voice. _

* * *

"_Don't you die on me!" _

* * *

"_You got hit again?" Bobby asked, acting as if he didn't care. _

"_Yeah. . ." Jack mumbled as he looked down at the ground, ashamed. _

"_Y' got t' grow a pair, Jackie-boy, otherwise those fuckers are always gonna hit you." He shut the fridge and turned to look at the young boy, who was still looking at the ground. . .but his eyes were filled with tears and his cheeks a deep red. Shit. He needed to learn to shut up. He sighed, and was about to say something. . .but Jackie ran off, shooting up the stairs. _

_He left his brother to cry upstairs. . .while he went and taught those little twats why they shouldn't bully his baby brother. Jackie didn't come home upset or beat up again till he was in high school after that. _

* * *

Shit. No wonder he couldn't stop Jack from opening the door - he had been distracted. He hadn't been watching. He hadn't been listening. He hadn't protected him. He hadn't been there for him.

But. . .had he ever really been there for him? Shit.

Bobby rubbed at his face before taking a drink out of the bottle. He was not going to cry. Shit, he was going to cry. Jack would probably have laughed at him.

He looked at his phone as it buzzed again. He'd had enough of it going off. Flipping it up and answering it, he snapped, "_What_!?"

"_Damn it man, why the fuck haven't y' answered!?"_ Angel yelled down the phone.

"I don't need this right now." Bobby mumbled. He had been sitting in the pub since he had got back after getting rid of Sweet. He didn't want to go home. He didn't want to go to. . .the morgue. He just wanted to get drunk and pass out. And he could do without more memories creeping back up too.

"_Listen t' me, man, Jack's not dead." _

Bobby slammed the bottle down on the table. "What the fuck-!? That's not funny, you fuckin' idiot-that's never goin' t' be funny!"

"_I'm not playing, ma-," _

There was a rustling on the other end of the line and then Jerry was speaking, _"He's serious Bobby, you need to come to the hospital."_

Bobby had never left a bar so quick in his entire life.

* * *

"_What the hell's goin' on!?" _Had been Bobby's first words when he stormed in the room where Jerry and Angel were. After some yelling and almost punching Angel, Bobby calmed down enough to listen to Jerry.

Jack had died. . .but hadn't stayed dead. When the paramedics were taking his baby brother to the morgue, he had woken up. It was as simple as that apparently, he'd woken up and spluttered blood choking. Apparently it was one of those unexplainable miracles, like the woman who had woken up in the morgue a few years ago after been there for two whole days or the guy who had been dead for a whole week before coming back.

He decided he didn't care. Why should he? Jack wasn't dead.

He was sitting next to Jack's bed. His brother was hooked up to different machines and wires and tubes. Bobby hated seeing him like this. He found himself wanting Jack to hurry up and be okay so he could get out of the hospital. . .but then he would remember Jackie was lucky to be alive and he had to be patient.

He didn't leave the bedside for three days, and on the forth night he finally fell asleep. . .only to be woken up by something tugging weakly at his arm on the bed. He lifted his head slowly, tiredly. He blinked a few times, just to make sure he was awake.

Jack was smiling at him.

His eyes widened and he shot out of his seat, his hands grabbing Jack's face. "Jack. Jackie, fuck sake you are alive!"

"O-ow, Bobby," Jack muttered, his voice was weak and quiet.

"Oh Jack," Bobby felt his eyes fill with tears. He couldn't help it and he couldn't stop it. "I was-I was," He took a deep breath. He couldn't be a coward anymore. "I was so scared when you-when I thought you were dead."

"I know," Jack croaked out. "I saw you crying, and shouting."

"You did, huh?" Bobby half-smirked.

"That was. . .the second scariest thing I've ever been through. . ."

Bobby knew Jack should stop talking, he needed to rest. . .but after everything his baby brother had been through, _him crying _was the second scariest thing that had happened to him. How was that even possible? "T-the second?"

Jack nodded. "Third was been shot, a lot. Second was seeing you cry shouting my name like that. And first. . .was you saying you didn't care."

Bobby closed his eyes; the third, was him-the second, was him not protecting Jack-the first, was him. All of Jack's scariest things revolved around him. Shit. He was such an asshole. "Jackie, I,"

"I know. It's okay. I can't beg you to feel the same,"

"No. That's not what I-," Bobby took a deep breath. "I'm sorry, for everything and. . .I lied, Jackie. I've always cared about you. And a lot more than I should, for a long while too."

Jack just stared at Bobby with soft eyes. "Y-you're not. . .running away? W-why? What ch-changed?

"I almost lost you," Bobby told him. It was different to him walking out two years ago and barely seeing Jackie since he said he didn't care. . .this time, Jack was dead. His baby brother should have died, he should have been left alone. "and I don't want to. I _can't_ lose you Jackie."

"You're. . .not gonna change your mind, r-right?"

Bobby let out a chuckle. "Not ever, Jackie."

Jack smiled, tears filling his eyes. "I-I love you, Bobby."

"I know," Bobby half-smirked. He leaned down and pressed his lips gently to Jack's, not wanting to hurt him. "and I love you too, y' fairy."

Jack smiled up at his brother, and then something felt. . .off. Something in his chest gave. Oh, so that was why he had survived. . .so he could say those words to Bobby for the second and _last _time.

Bobby stared into Jack's eyes, smiling. . .but his baby brother's eyes dimed all of a sudden, as if the life was going out of-oh fuck! "Nurse! Someone help! Hurry!" He shouted at the top of his lungs. He turned back to Jackie, holding his arms tightly. "_Please,_ Jackie, don't leave me!" He couldn't help the tears that sprung to his eyes, he was full on crying. He couldn't get Jack back just lose him a few days later. He couldn't go through that again.

He was crying. . .But Jack was smiling, even as the light in his eyes dimed. Jack was. . .happy? Why?

And then it hit him. He had told his baby brother he loved him. After years of sleeping together, acting as if he didn't care more than a brother, two years of barely talking. . .he had finally said those three words.

Is that why Jackie hadn't died? Like some sort of unfinished business bullshit?

The nurses and a doctor came rushing in as the machine next to Jack started to make a loud noise. Bobby tried to keep hold of Jack but was pulled away from him. He didn't know who was pulling him out of the room and he didn't try to fight. All he could see was the smile on Jackie's face.

* * *

"Bobby?" Jerry asked quietly.

Bobby kept his head in his hands, leaning forward on the plastic chair in the waiting room. He didn't want to listen to his brother unless he said Jack was okay. . .but he wasn't going to hear that anytime soon, was he?

"Bobby, you need to listen," Jerry tried again. He looked over at Angel, giving him a 'what-do-i-do?' kind of look.

Angel sighed and stood from his seat. "Bobby, we have to know this, so that means you do too." He said as he stood in front of his older brother.

Bobby looked up, he knew his face was red and his eyes teary –the only time Jerry and Angel had seen him cry was when Jack had been shot a few days ago. "Are you going to tell me Jackie's okay? That he's not dead? 'Cause if you ain't, I don't need to fucking hear it!"

Jerry gave his oldest brother a sad look; he knew what Jack meant to Bobby. He had always known how much the two had cared for the other. . .probably even before they did themselves.

Angel frowned at his brother. "Are you kidding? You're not the only one that cared about Jack! He was our brother too!"

Bobby's jaw clenched, ready to argue back, but then he slumped back in his chair. "So he is dead?"

Jerry wiped at his eyes. "Yeah, Bobby, he died."

Bobby just stared at the door, a blank but sad look on his face. Jack was dead. For good this time.

"The doctor said he was still smiling, even when his heart finally gave out." Jerry told Bobby, he knew the older man needed to hear it.

Bobby closed his eyes. Jack had been smiling. He had been okay with what was coming. . .he had been okay with dying. He smiled sadly; Jackie had been okay in the end. He was finally happy.

Jack was finally happy. And that was good, that made Bobby happy, and maybe-just maybe knowing that he could keep going on living. Maybe.

* * *

End!

Well, not my best but certainly not my worst, lol. Anyway this was just something to get back into posting again I guess, been finding it so hard to concerntrate on my fics. Hope you liked!

p.s. I wasn't going to let Jack die, but then I figured always chicken out of killing characters off. . .so I let him die :'( I know, I hate me too :'(


End file.
